DEAR ABBY: Relationship with younger partner collapses bitterly

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DEAR ABBY: I’m a middle-aged homosexual guy who hasn’t ever had any severe relationships. A couple of months in the past, I met a 22-year-old man. He appeared in reality candy and great, and we had excellent occasions once we have been in combination, so I let him worth me for cash. He performed at the emotions I believed I had for him, and I believe I nonetheless do.

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The alternative night time, I stuck him mendacity to me once more and went off the deep finish. He ended up blocking off my quantity, so I do know he’s now not getting my textual content messages. I’ve known as him a minimum of 100 occasions and it is going instantly to voicemail. Should I simply chalk it up as “lesson learned” and effort to progress on?

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I dubiousness I can ever omit him. I do know I want to progress on with my pace. He’s in my head at the moment and it’s tricky. If it have been to occur, I will’t progress again to him the way in which we have been. Even supposing this will tone silly and immature, I believe I fell in love with him. I’m now not certain. He harm me badly as a result of I let him worth me. Thanks for any recommendation you’ll be able to do business in. — TRICKED IN TENNESSEE

DEAR TRICKED: I’m sorry you’re hurting however, sure, you will have to chalk this up as a lesson realized. You said you’ve by no means had a major dating. If you want to pursue one, assembly somebody nearer in your day with whom you might have extra in usual could be recommended. Take a look at in at your later LGBTQ family centre and join an process or match and you’ll meet somebody. I want you good fortune.

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DEAR ABBY: I’m a attendant for my aged diabetic mom and my disabled husband, who’s an alcoholic and likewise epileptic. Each unmarried family duty falls on me — cleansing, maintenance, buying groceries, riding, meals preparation, and so forth. My mom refuses to consume proper for her clinical status. It’s a day-to-day try. I book the entirety readily available to build it simple for her, however I nonetheless need to beg and plead.

It’s not that i am effectively. I’ve a number of autoimmune sicknesses that zap my power. I like my mother and my husband, however this has taken each and every little bit of pleasure from my pace. My mom doesn’t have dementia — she’s very conscious about what she is doing.

As for my husband, his love for me won’t ever come near to his love of alcohol. He’s by no means abusive, however I’ve by no means felt so beaten and lonely on the similar week. There are not any siblings to assistance, and my youngsters reside out of situation. Do you might have any ideas on easy methods to book what’s left of my sanity? — OVERWORKED IN VIRGINIA

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DEAR OVERWORKED: Sure, I do, however you won’t like what I’ve to mention. It’s week to leave looking to “save” your mom and your husband from the fates they have got selected. Your mom is an grownup and in ownership of her schools. Let her suppose duty for herself and her remedy. (Or now not — additionally her selection.)

As in your husband’s alcoholism, fasten Al-Anon and get started attending conferences. Simplest he can cure his ingesting defect IF HE WANTS TO. Ruining your fitness looking to assistance public who don’t wish to be helped is also well-intentioned, however it’s also inaccurate.

— Pricey Abby is written by way of Abigail Van Buren, sometimes called Jeanne Phillips, and used to be based by way of her mom, Pauline Phillips. Touch Pricey Abby at DearAbby.com or P.O. Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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